Marriages are undoubtedly very challenging. So you’re not alone if your marital relationship isn’t going as well as you’d like. Unfortunately, many marriages are on the verge of breakdown. But there is still hope. You can take simple measures today to rekindle the love in your marriage.
What are common reasons why love in marriage starts to dwindle?
There are many reasons why the love in marriage can start to dwindle. Some common causes include:
- When partners feel unappreciated
- Partners feel like they are bearing all the burden alone
- Either couple feels like they are being taken for granted
- One or both partners feel like their needs are not being met
How can you tell if your marriage needs a bit of love?
You’re not alone if you feel like your marriage’s love has faded. But unfortunately, it’s typical for the excitement and passion of newlywed life to give way to the realities of day-to-day living.
Here are some ways to tell that your marriage needs more love:
- Partners not talking to each other
- When you become snappy or criticize each other frequently
- Lack of physical intimacy with your partner
Why is it important to rekindle the love in your marriage?
It’s no secret that marriages go through ups and downs. The initial excitement of the honeymoon phase fades, and you’re left with the reality of day-to-day life with your spouse.
That’s not to say that the love fades away completely – it just takes a bit more effort to keep the flame alive. So why is it important to rekindle the love in your marriage?
For one, happy marriages have been linked with better physical health. In addition, studies have shown that married couples have a 50% lower risk of dying prematurely than single couples (UCLA Health).
But it’s not just physical health that benefits from a strong marriage – mental and emotional health does too. Another study found that happy marriages lead to increased happiness levels. In contrast, unhappy marriages lead to decreased satisfaction.
So, not only is it important to rekindle the love in your marriage for your well-being, but also the well-being of your spouse.
What are some simple measures to bring love back into your marriage?
Make your marriage a priority to rekindle the love
Making your marriage a priority is one of the most uncomplicated measures to restore the love in your relationship. It may seem like a no-brainer, but letting other things take precedence is easy if you’re not making time for your partner.
Date nights, weekend getaways, and regular check-ins are all critical for keeping the spark alive. But even small gestures can make a big difference. Show that you’re willing to go the extra mile for your spouse. Whether by texting them during the day to let them know you’re thinking of them or taking care of a chore they hate.
Try understanding and meeting each other’s vital emotional needs in your marriage.
One of the most important things you can do to improve your marriage is to try to understand and meet each other’s vital emotional needs. Emotional needs are feelings that tell us we are loved, valued, and essential to our spouse. We feel loved and secure in our relationship when these needs are met. Conversely, we can feel neglected, unimportant, and unloved when they are unmet.
There are different ways to meet emotional needs, but one of the best ways is through acts of service. Acts of kindness are things you do for your spouse that show them you care about them and want to make their life easier. They can be big things like taking care of the kids for a night, so your spouse can have a break or small things like making coffee in the morning or taking out the trash.
It’s important to remember that everyone’s emotional needs are different. What might be a need for one person might not be a need for another. That’s why it’s essential to communicate with your spouse about what they need from you. If you’re not sure what their needs are, ask them! It might seem awkward initially, but it will get easier with practice. And it will be worth it when you see the difference it makes in your relationship.
Understand and speak your spouse’s primary love language.
One of the best things you can do to rekindle the love in your marriage is to learn and speak your spouse’s “primary love language.” We all have different ways of expressing and receiving love; often, these needs aren’t met in our marriage. If you can take the time to learn how your spouse says love and make an effort to meet that need, it will go a long way in rebuilding your relationship.
There are five primary love languages: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. Unfortunately, we often assume that our spouse knows how we want to be loved and expect them to “know” what we need. But this isn’t always the case.
If you’re unsure which love language your spouse speaks, look for clues in their behaviour. Also, you can ask them the following three questions and pay attention to their answers.
- How can I help you?
- How can I make your life easier?
- How can I be a better husband or wife?
Spend quality time together with your spouse.
Spending quality time together is essential to keep the spark alive in your marriage. Recreational companionship can be achieved through the following activities:
– Going on regular date nights
– Planning weekend getaways
– Taking part in shared hobbies or interests
– Connecting emotionally as well as physically
Prioritize intimate conversation in your marriage.
A straightforward measure to rekindle the love in your marriage is to prioritize intimate conversation. When you and your spouse take the time to talk to and listen to each other, you can connect on a deeper level and reignite the spark that brought you together in the first place.
Learn how best to settle your marital conflicts without violence.
Conflicts are inevitable in marriage. It is how couples settle the quarrels that can make or mar them. Often than not, when couples find themselves amid marital problems, it’s because they have stopped doing the things that kept the love alive in their relationship in the first place.
Couples should try to settle the common marital conflicts around finances, children, inlaws and friends. Open communication and respect are crucial to conflict resolution.
Seek couple counselling or therapy.
Couple counselling or therapy can help rekindle the love in your marriage. It can allow you to communicate openly and honestly with your partner about the issues causing problems in your relationship. Couple counselling can also help you to learn new skills for communicating and resolving conflict. If you are having difficulties in your marriage, seek couple counselling or therapy as soon as possible to help improve your relationship. However, it would help if you didn’t wait till it’s too late.
How can couples rekindle love after a marital problem?
- Talk openly about the problem without any judgements
- Be affectionate
- Seek solutions together through counselling
- Forgive each other
- Be willing to compromise.
Rekindling the love in your marriage is not always easy, but it is worth the effort. With time and effort, you can bring the spark back into your relationship and enjoy a happy and healthy marriage.
- Endeavour to make your marriage a priority
- Understand and meet each other’s vital emotional needs
- Know and speak your spouse’s primary love language
- Spend quality time together with your spouse
- Prioritize intimate conversation in your marriage.
- Learn how to settle your marital conflicts without violence.
- Seek couple counselling or therapy.
Which of the above measures resonates with you?
I would love to hear your thoughts.
Thanks for your time.